John Meyer Books
The Ten Categories of Readers You’ll Find at a Book Festival
Sunday began early for me – like three-thirty in the morning early when the DJ/bartender/drug dealer who lives below my condo decided to throw another one of his impromptu, late night parties. He’s very astute at throwing shindigs on nights when I need to get up early. So I quite hate him.
This past Sunday, I needed to get up early for the Word on the Street Festival, a Toronto book fair where allegedly 200,000 potential readers roam around Queen’s Park looking to buy some books.
I was late in registering and managed to reserve a half table under the Fringe Beat tent. I don’t exactly know what “fringe beat” means but it was the cheapest option – and beggars can’t be choosers.
So it was cramped and I had to get cozy with some nice old ladies who ran an art collective representing other small-scale artists, including a woman who allegedly made books out of tea bags (?!). But they brought a nice green tablecloth to share with me, so I became a big fan.
So two hundred and seventy-eight exhibitors, including bookstores, publishing houses, and I, set up and battled the constant shifting elements from morning chills to pesky wind blasts to glorious sunshine to rain bursts and deceptive puddles.
And after diligently standing and selling books for seven hours, I was able to identify the ten categories of readers that roam through book festivals.
10. The Hunters and Gatherers – the ones who had no intention of sampling the merchandise. They knew what they wanted, bought it, and stormed out of the crowd.
9. The Nervous Nellies – the ones who safely kept their distance and feared walking closer to the booths, just in case they had to engage with others.
8. The Angry Sniffers – the older ones who were not impressed with “fictional travel memoirs,” often glancing at my book and walking away with a scowl while muttering, “…travel memoir…”
7. The Complimentary Strollers – the ones who breezed by my table, slowed down to read my sign, mutter “good title,” and kept walking…
6. The Fragile Squirrels – the ones who mustered up the courage to read the back of my book, but then drop it and flee the moment I wished them a “good afternoon.”
5. The Frantic Foragers – the ones who simply wanted to snatch a business card and fade back into the crowd (hopefully to later peruse my website and maybe make a purchase).
4. The Broke Boasters – the ones who wanted to hear about my book but immediately proclaimed that they didn’t have any money or already broke their budget on other product. (But they always walked away with a business card.)
3. The Covenant Breakers – the ones who read the back of my book, talked about it, and then promised to come back later to buy it… but didn’t. (But they always walked away with a business card.)
2. The Favorites – the ones who read the back of my book, talked about it, thought about it… and then purchased it. (And yes, I signed every one!)
1. The Friends – the ones who visited me to keep me company, provide support, buy me a coffee, buy me a spiked lemonade, and even buy another book. So thank you, Katie, Stephanie, Gillian, Marni, Brad, Traci, and Jay! You guys made the day go by fast! And a special, warm fuzzy, thank you to Joanne who helped me set up and stayed with me the entire day! You were awesome!
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